LoveCubby Blog

It's No-men-ber! What is it and why?

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Welcome to No-men-ber!! -Nomenber: noun | No·men·ber | \ nō-ˈmen-bər , nə- \1) : the month (during November) one dedicates to not giving a fuck about not having a man in one's life. 2) :  The month in which an independent person gives themselves permission to enjoy being single and keeping it that way.3) : The month a person (typically a woman or gay man) spends zero effort thinking about or vying for the approval of men.- Hi, I’m a 36yo SWF (per the established rules of dating, that’s my lede). I have been single for pretty much my entire thirties - with a smattering of short-term ‘relationships’...

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6 Ways to Bust Gender Roles in the Bedroom

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6 Ways to Bust Gender Roles in the Bedroom

Once you’ve taken on a sexual role, it can be hard to shake. Photo: Christal Yuen When you’ve been having sex with the same person for a while, whether in a committed partnership or a strictly sexy relationship, it can be all too easy to slide into a particular sexual role. Living in a patriarchy, dominant societal narratives about masculine and feminine traits undoubtedly follow us into our sex lives. Whether you’re heterosexual or part of the LGBTQ+ community, traditional gendered thinking and action can play a part in the sex you’re having. Dominant, passive, freaky, demure… these traits are...

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The Definitive LoveCubby Guide to Vibrators

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The Definitive LoveCubby Guide to Vibrators

Oh, the vibrator. She has a long a storied history. Invented by male doctors whose hands got tired from jerking off “hysterical” women, the vibrator has been a symbol of female sexual repression and empowerment. Thirty years out from the sexual revolution, the vibrator has evolved from practical tool to sexual phenomenon, coming in all shapes, sizes, colors, and tastes. In the US, over half of women and nearly half of men will admit to incorporating vibrators into their sex lives. For those who go for the buzz, vibrators have been linked to health-promoting behaviors and positive sexual function. For...

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Sexual Vocabulary to Throw Away Immediately

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Sexual Vocabulary to Throw Away Immediately

 Kick these unsexy phrases to the curb. Photo: James Fitzgerald When it comes to a little dirty talk between two consenting adults, not much is off limits. However, if you believe that the language we use shapes the way we think, much of the sexual vocabulary we pick up from mass media and porn is undoubtedly harmful. Academics have been researching the connection between porn and respect for women since the ’70s. Many of the behaviors that we see in porn have made their way into the mainstream media, and our bedrooms. As the internet exploded the porn industry and...

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The Art of Mutual Pleasure: How to Orgasm Together

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The Art of Mutual Pleasure: How to Orgasm Together

A guide for chasing those elusive twin peaks.  Photo: Eyesplash. For some, there’s nothing hotter in the bedroom than making their partner feel good and delaying their own satisfaction. Others are selfish lovers, and anyone who’s encountered that particular breed knows their shortcomings all too well — pun intended. In the middle of these extremes is the ideal of truly equal, mutual pleasure. The ultimate symbol of mutual pleasure? The elusive simultaneous orgasm. Coming at the same time is a dubious proposal at best, despite the persistent trope of “Yes, yes, YES!”-ing couples on big and small screens “arriving” together....

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